Thursday, October 4, 2007

Parenting: Not for the faint of heart...or stomach

After distributing photos of Georgia via Ofoto, we received multiple comments from friends and family along the lines of, "Gee, it looks like you're really taking to motherhood so well," or, "You guys are making it look easy." Well, we do appreciate the compliments and hope that we're turning out to be okay parents; however, we'd like to point out that most people (smart ones, anyway) don't whip out the camera to photograph their wife's hormonal postpartum meltdowns, their 11 p.m. walks around the block with a crying baby, the handling of all manner of human waste, and the like. In the interest of full disclosure, though, we have captured a few of our foibles, and we're not too proud to share these if you can stomach it.

1) Me dealing with the pain in the ass, er, I mean..., life-saving SNS feeding system after having been discharged from the hospital under the burden of the lactation consultant's warning that we might be "starving" our child. Miraculously, a mere 2 days later, Georgia's pediatrician asked if I had somehow been breastfeeding Georgia Haagen Dazs based on her rapid weight gain. (Sorry if that pic was too much skin. I'm decent, though, right? Whatever - after the flower delivery guy walked in on me in the hospital room, I lost all concern (and perhaps dignity, too).)

2) Joe on the way from the nursery to the kitchen counter in preparation for Georgia's first bath. Lesson learned: make absolutely sure that you've covered the gun before transporting a naked baby, or else be prepared to clean the aftermath from walls, floors, and clothes.

3) No picture of this one, but I've discovered that my eyes are slow to adjust when it's time for those middle of the night feedings. Last night I slammed my face into our bedroom door. No, not a closed door that I didn't realize was closed. An open door. Somehow I managed to catch the 2" width of the open door smack down the left side of my face. It hurt - as Tommy Boy would say - "Not here. Or here so much. But right here. "

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